The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize