Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
