haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
