idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
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