Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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