This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize