Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Who did Billy Mays play for?
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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