How's work?
Spinning.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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