i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
It's blow job season.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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