fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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