I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
