Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
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