i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Found your dick twin last night
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize