She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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