she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
