I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
