I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
