This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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