summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize
