So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
