we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
