he shaved USA in his pubs
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
