I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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