one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
