Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
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