lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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