Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
