Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
