I just cut my nipple shaving
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
