its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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