Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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