i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
