Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I pour the whiskey from now on
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
