I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
