Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize
