god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
