I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
True strength comes from lack of pants
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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