Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
