I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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