dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Do vagina's smell?
No subtext here. People are naked.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
