do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
