I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize
