It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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