i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize