Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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