I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
