I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
The dick lei will go down in squad history
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Randomize