he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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