Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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