it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize