Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You need a sexual gate keeper
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
